New Book: 'Taking Charge; A Journey Of Recovery'

This is a great piece of news from a fellow TM-survivor! I first met Professor Graham Martin at our local "Spinal-Injuries-Association" branch, in Brisbane during 2011's "TM-Day" gathering. As my memory serves, it was a day of personal character building for me, and a sharing of experiences by Graham, that helped me to change my appreciation of the "neuro-immunological-condition" that is Transverse-Myelitis, and turn my attitude to "life with-TM" around.

Given my limited physicality, impacted through TM-related symptoms of constant 'Neuropathic-Pain', 'Numbness', and 'Shooting-Pains and Muscle-Cramps' in the legs, arms, hands and feet, even so - I am currently taking Physiotherapy sessions to improve my 'core-strength'; Occupational-Therapy to "get back behind the wheel" driving a vehicle again-(with medical clearance); and Speech-Therapy to aid my Larynx-vocalisation recovery.

I will be getting myself a copy of his new book too! He is a lovely person, and genuinely funny. Please read on, and challenge yourself...

"...Sunday, August 11, 2013..."

New Book: 'Taking Charge; a journey of recovery' by Professor Graham Martin.

I stand, I walk, I talk - Professor Graham Martin

This book traces my first experience of serious illness and my admission to hospital. As a doctor, somehow you expect to be able to diagnose your own illnesses (wrong), get some slight preference in hospital (wrong), have colleagues and staff treat you with care and respect (wrong), know how to manage your illness (wrong). Personally my experience of Transverse Myelitis was terrifying. My initial experiences in hospitals were just awful, and really quite traumatising.
You may not be interested in the illness itself. But I am sure you will have expectations of how you should be treated in hospitals.
My reaction to the whole thing was to record daily experiences and try to makes sense of them. What started as a miserable life experience turned into something funny, wry, and challenging. I am told by my readers that the book is funny and sad - all at the same time.
Give it a go. You can buy a paperback copy, or download a pdf eBook

Purchase the book here: 'Taking Charge: a journey of recovery'

Hypnosis to tackle problems of chronic pain: International expert..

This is a little snippet from a link of mine, at 'Chronic-Pain-Australia'. Please read on.. 

"...A visiting international rehabilitation expert has called for Hypnotic Therapy to be considered a ‘mainstream’ treatment option in the management of chronic pain, potentially benefiting thousands of Australian pain sufferers. Presenting at the Australasian Faculty of Rehabilitation Medicine, Annual Scientific Meeting in Brisbane today, Professor Mark Jensen, Vice Chair for Research in the Department of Rehabilitation Medicine, University of Washington, urged Australian healthcare professionals to discuss the option with their patients. 

“Pain management for patients, particularly those with long-term illness or injury requires a considered and holistic approach,” Professor Jensen said. “Imaging studies have shown that Hypnotic Therapy influences all of the cortical areas and neuro-physiological process that underline pain. “Helping patients manage pain can have a significant psychological impact. What people do to manage pain and what they think about pain, and their social environment, can all influence pain and its negative impact on functioning.”

Stark Beauty

Findings that could have significant benefit for sufferers of chronic pain, their family members and caregivers, show that Hypnosis can reduce daily background pain intensity for many patients. Moreover, recent well-documented clinical trials in people with disabilities have demonstrated that Hypnotic treatment for chronic pain has specific effects on pain intensity over and above effects based on placebo (expectancy) alone.

This is good news for the estimated one in five adult Australians (3.2 million) that suffer chronic pain, a number that is projected to increase as Australia’s population ages.
“Hypnosis still has a certain stigma to it,” Professor Jensen said. “However we are seeing this treatment option used to manage debilitating physical and psychological conditions including phobias and addiction.

“It may be that physicians are not recommending Hypnotic to their patients due to a lack of understanding of the process, or it may be that patients are wary of Hypnosis.
“Hypnotic treatment for chronic pain management has proven efficacy and should be explored as a viable option in the treatment plan.”

Further to the pain management results associated with Hypnotic Therapy, Hypnosis can influence a number of non-pain-related quality-of-life domains according to Professor Jensen.

“Based on various international studies, the side effects of Hypnosis have been shown to be overwhelmingly positive. Indirectly, any therapy that can assist with pain management can ease the burden on caregivers, and positively impact family relationships.”

Professor Jensen recommends that rehabilitation physicians train patients in the use of self-Hypnosis to achieve immediate pain relief and provide audio recordings of treatment sessions to enhance treatment effects..."

Sources: http://http://www.news-medical.net/; http://www.chronicpainaustralia.com.au/ ; http://www.racp.edu.au/

What an astonishing thing a book is!

"...What an astonishing thing a book is! It is a flat object, made from a tree. With flexible parts on which are printed - with lots of funny dark squiggles. But, one glance at it and your inside the mind of another person, maybe, somebody dead for thousands of years!

Across the millennia, an Author is speaking clearly and silently, inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people who never knew each other, citizens of different epochs. Books, break the shackles of time! 

A book, is proof that humans are truly capable of working magic!..." - Carl Sagan.

From Timeline Photos

A friend sent this picture to me on Facebook!  And I couldn't agree more with the message, as I have only just finished reading the first novel in a series by author Lee Child, titled.."Killing Floor", in which he introduces the character.."Jack Reacher". Anyway, I have just begun the Jack Reacher series' 2nd book, titled.."Die Trying". I recommend Lee Child, he is a rollicking good read.

So, in the space of two months - I have finished one, and started two books, which for me is a world record! I am the first to admit that I am terrible - no, woeful in fact is a better word - when it comes to reading "books". The last time I finished a book from cover to cover was about twenty years ago, no joke! It was, "The Hunt for Red October".

In the same amount of time, my wife J has read, probably - literally hundreds of titles! And so has my oldest son MG, and he isn't yet twenty-one! This is a fact that I am not proud of for myself, for my reading-list of novels is shocking. But, I am intent on making up some of the ground, this year at least.

I am a reader of journals, 'text-books', and magazines though, anything that deals with the sciences, engineering, physics, the sea, the air - nature is fair game too! My engineering background gives me an insight into the wonders of the universe, through astronomy - a 'genre' that I have loved since I was old enough to sit in front of the TV and watch the documentaries, made famous by Carl Sagan himself, ..."Cosmos - A Personal Voyage", way back in 1980 - (R.I.P, Carl). My first venture into science fiction was with my brother G in 1977, when we went to see "Star-Wars", need I say more.

Back to books, then. The first book I read that had me hooked-on-reading, (that I remember), was - "Walt Disney - Fantasyland". So I guess I have been hooked on science and science-fiction, because of Walt Disney! He was one 'far-out-dude', in his day! 

A sign for the..."World's Largest 2nd-Hand Book Sale", in Brisbane CBD.

My wife J and our 3 boys have gone every year to the "Worlds-Largest-2nd-Hand-Book-Sale", held in Brisbane in winter. Our home is happy to receive some new 'friends', each sale! They really come cheap too, some books only costing 5-cents. But they are priceless in the way that they can become our treasured possessions in no time at all. All types are catered for - no topic is off the table. If your're lucky - you might find just what your looking for, even if you weren't really there looking - just looking!


Reading is a good way of taking my mind off my persistent-pain! It's been strongly recommended by my OT, and specialist neurologist - so I've been doing a lot of it (in small doses). I have to agree, it actually works best when you really get 'into-it', so I've been reading in bed (mainly), then going off to sleep. It will take me about 2-months to read a 500-page book! I know that is terribly slow for 99% of people (like watching your fingernails-grow!), but It is my pace at this moment.

So go grab a book and start reading now, for goodness sake!   

Happy Valentines Day to You & Yours!

Well, it is Valentines Day - I wish whoever should read this post today - for you to have a wonderful day! ..And I hope that you all get to share it with your significant others too! I think any opportunity to share love, and be loved is important. As important and sacred as life itself. We must take time to "smell-the-roses", I will share my St.Valentines-Day story with you.


My Valentines Day this year (2013), started out with a... "BANG!"...Scratch ...Screech ...Thud! My family's 13yo black Lab "McKenzie" - beautiful, gentle, loving - having a fit - a panicked dog unable to stand on his all fours for the first time (like this)-in his life. Crazed commotion woke me up! I wasn't sure what was happening at first, I couldn't see him. But, I could hear him - in the faint light of the early morning, his motion eventually awakened my 16yo son JD, too! As we both looked into the wardrobe, we saw a helpless animal trying to make to-stand-up! 


We got him settled - eventually! A dog this old - has a high risk of having an "episode" like this, right! Even so - it bloody scared me and JD. After we cleaned him up, we gave him a 'once-over' and helped him over to his food-bowl - not hungry, ok. His water-bowl next. No. That's ok, so I thought I might take him for a walk outside, then. To get some fresh air (me too!). We got as far as the grass - it was damp with "dew", and "Mack" lost his step... And again... Another stumble. so, I called JD out to help him with his stride and gait. He walked alongside "Mack", like a tug-boat ushers a bulk-carrier around a harbour. We managed to walk him for no more than 30-paces, before he stumbled to his right. Drooped-over he looked like he wasn't "there".

We both looked at each other and my eyes welled-up. I was witnessing my mate - our family's companion - take a 'turn", I said to JD that 'I think he's had a "Stroke". So, we gently turned McKenzie back, into the house. Back to his favourite Pillow/Cushion - and JD, layed down with him on the floor. I went into the bedroom and had a moment to myself - sobbing. I was coming to the hard realisation, that my dog is on borrowed time! My wife J, and I had a quick "heart-to-heart" with our boys - TJ, JD, and LE. We made a safe place in the car for Mack to be comfortable, and we rang the Vet...


We made the dash to the Vet's. About a 20-minute drive. We were ushered straight into the clinic - and met the lady Vet, Erin. She was so gentle with McKenzie, and it was like he just melted into her hands - like their was a "magic-power" between them. The Sick & the Healer. It was a special moment for all of us! After a few tense minutes of Erin looking over every inch of Mack's frame and muscles. Down on the ground with him, she was like a 'mother' - gentle! All-the-while-she was whispering to him - calming him (and us too!), but still checking, feeling, analysing. Then after she was finished - she stood up. Well, she said... I want to take a blood sample, if that's ok? ...Yes, it was ok.


Afterwards, we got the news. It seems as though our hunch was right - a "Stroke". Somewhat to be expected, but never the less - a shock to 'our' system! We all had a little sob, again. But, Erin said .."There is some good news from all this. McKenzie's blood work-up is excellent"! His Heart, is in good shape. His lungs are fine, no fluid. Liver, great. Kidneys, good. He is in terrific condition for a dog of his years-(13+). We were in a kind of weird space! Happy-sad!

MacKensie is our hero! He does have a facial growth/tumour, which we'll have to treat palliatively, and he has "wonky" back legs from the 'stroke' too. But, we get to be blessed by a beautiful, black (& gray)-puppy for a while longer! However long that time is - we don't know. We just know that today was not his day to say goodbye to us!

The love of an animal is a blessing! 
Happy Valentines-Day, Mackenzie!

TM. A Neuro-Immunologic-Condition...

Transverse Myelitis

A l l   u p   t o - d a t e   i n f o r m a t i o n   o n   c l i n i c a l 
s t u d i e s   a n d   t r i a l s   c a n   b e   f o u n d   o n 
http://myelitis.org/research/clinical-studies-trials

For those of you, who are still reading this far - I thought I would just reprise an earlier post that I made, almost a year ago. I think it means so much - especially when you might be able to relate, as I have - to this remarkable, true story! (thank you Christine...)

read on.. 


Thank you for all the support, it's really amazing!  I've titled this post; "but you don't look sick...!" because it relates to a little yarn-of-truth called, "The Spoon Theory" written by Christine Miserandino, a complete stranger to me. Christine is living with 'Lupus' and I must sincerely thank her for helping me realise [my] pain isn't always felt by those I love and care about. And, that I have to take account of the decisions I make when it involves others, especially my family. I can relate to her story [me living with Transverse Myelitis]. I can also thank my wife 'Woodpuddle', for finding this yarn on the Internet and sending it to me, some time ago.

I want to share something with you that happened to me yesterday. My beautiful wife 'Woodpuddle' is so bloody patient with me! ...So yesterday, WP came up with the idea for all of us at the TRC-[my family] to go for a drive in to 'Southbank', then to Scouts - and I wanted to go along too. I was 'quizzed' by my dearest;"are you sure you're up to this?" I said; 'yep', nodding in the affirmative! Well, off we went in the car..it wasn't too long , before travelling-in-the-car become more [painful], than I realised. Pretty soon after that, I started to argue with everyone about the shortest-route to take! ..I didn't even think; 'Why am I arguing?' No, not even when my youngest - TJ said; 'I love it when you and Mum have a cranky with each other, it's so funny!'... 

But the thing is, I should've understood that "it just didn't matter" - we were just out for a FUN time!!! - Eventually, after a few minutes of awkward silence, 'The Penny-Dropped' and I apologised, very honestly to all my family. We continued to Southbank, then later to Scouts. The day was resurrected - looking back, I feel like a fool because I lost my cool. My wife new I probably wasn't up to a full day, just yet. I pushed myself  - and I'm paying for it, today - I am living the spoon-theory. Please read on...

"The Spoon Theory"
by Christine Miserandino   www.butyoudontlooksick.com

...My best friend and I were in the diner, talking. As usual, it was very late and we were eating French fries with gravy. Like normal girls our age, we spent a lot of time in the diner while in college, and most of the time we spent talking about boys, music or trivial things, that seemed very important at the time. We never got serious about anything in particular and spent most of our time laughing.
As I went to take some of my medicine with a snack as I usually did, she watched me with an awkward kind of stare, instead of continuing the conversation. She then asked me out of the blue what it felt like to have Lupus and be sick. I was shocked not only because she asked the random question, but also because I assumed she knew all there was to know about Lupus. She came to doctors with me, she saw me walk with a cane, and throw up in the bathroom. She had seen me cry in pain, what else was there to know?
I started to ramble on about pills, and aches and pains, but she kept pursuing, and didn’t seem satisfied with my answers. I was a little surprised as being my roommate in college and friend for years; I thought she already knew the medical definition of Lupus. Then she looked at me with a face every sick person knows well, the face of pure curiosity about something no one healthy can truly understand. She asked what it felt like, not physically, but what it felt like to be me, to be sick.
As I tried to gain my composure, I glanced around the table for help or guidance, or at least stall for time to think. I was trying to find the right words. How do I answer a question I never was able to answer for myself? How do I explain every detail of every day being effected, and give the emotions a sick person goes through with clarity. I could have given up, cracked a joke like I usually do, and changed the subject, but I remember thinking if I don’t try to explain this, how could I ever expect her to understand. If I can’t explain this to my best friend, how could I explain my world to anyone else? I had to at least try.
At that moment, the spoon theory was born. I quickly grabbed every spoon on the table; hell I grabbed spoons off of the other tables. I looked at her in the eyes and said “Here you go, you have Lupus”. She looked at me slightly confused, as anyone would when they are being handed a bouquet of spoons. The cold metal spoons clanked in my hands, as I grouped them together and shoved them into her hands.
I explained that the difference in being sick and being healthy is having to make choices or to consciously think about things when the rest of the world doesn’t have to. The healthy have the luxury of a life without choices, a gift most people take for granted.
Most people start the day with unlimited amount of possibilities, and energy to do whatever they desire, especially young people. For the most part, they do not need to worry about the effects of their actions. So for my explanation, I used spoons to convey this point. I wanted something for her to actually hold, for me to then take away, since most people who get sick feel a “loss” of a life they once knew. If I was in control of taking away the spoons, then she would know what it feels like to have someone or something else, in this case Lupus, being in control.
She grabbed the spoons with excitement. She didn’t understand what I was doing, but she is always up for a good time, so I guess she thought I was cracking a joke of some kind like I usually do when talking about touchy topics. Little did she know how serious I would become?
I asked her to count her spoons. She asked why, and I explained that when you are healthy you expect to have a never-ending supply of “spoons”. But when you have to now plan your day, you need to know exactly how many “spoons” you are starting with. It doesn’t guarantee that you might not lose some along the way, but at least it helps to know where you are starting. She counted out 12 spoons. She laughed and said she wanted more. I said no, and I knew right away that this little game would work, when she looked disappointed, and we hadn’t even started yet. I’ve wanted more “spoons” for years and haven’t found a way yet to get more, why should she? I also told her to always be conscious of how many she had, and not to drop them because she can never forget she has Lupus.
I asked her to list off the tasks of her day, including the most simple. As, she rattled off daily chores, or just fun things to do; I explained how each one would cost her a spoon. When she jumped right into getting ready for work as her first task of the morning, I cut her off and took away a spoon. I practically jumped down her throat. I said ” No! You don’t just get up. You have to crack open your eyes, and then realize you are late. You didn’t sleep well the night before. You have to crawl out of bed, and then you have to make your self something to eat before you can do anything else, because if you don’t, you can’t take your medicine, and if you don’t take your medicine you might as well give up all your spoons for today and tomorrow too.” I quickly took away a spoon and she realized she hasn’t even gotten dressed yet. Showering cost her spoon, just for washing her hair and shaving her legs. Reaching high and low that early in the morning could actually cost more than one spoon, but I figured I would give her a break; I didn’t want to scare her right away. Getting dressed was worth another spoon. I stopped her and broke down every task to show her how every little detail needs to be thought about. You cannot simply just throw clothes on when you are sick. I explained that I have to see what clothes I can physically put on, if my hands hurt that day buttons are out of the question. If I have bruises that day, I need to wear long sleeves, and if I have a fever I need a sweater to stay warm and so on. If my hair is falling out I need to spend more time to look presentable, and then you need to factor in another 5 minutes for feeling badly that it took you 2 hours to do all this.
I think she was starting to understand when she theoretically didn’t even get to work, and she was left with 6 spoons. I then explained to her that she needed to choose the rest of her day wisely, since when your “spoons” are gone, they are gone. Sometimes you can borrow against tomorrow’s “spoons”, but just think how hard tomorrow will be with less “spoons”. I also needed to explain that a person who is sick always lives with the looming thought that tomorrow may be the day that a cold comes, or an infection, or any number of things that could be very dangerous. So you do not want to run low on “spoons”, because you never know when you truly will need them. I didn’t want to depress her, but I needed to be realistic, and unfortunately being prepared for the worst is part of a real day for me.
We went through the rest of the day, and she slowly learned that skipping lunch would cost her a spoon, as well as standing on a train, or even typing at her computer too long. She was forced to make choices and think about things differently. Hypothetically, she had to choose not to run errands, so that she could eat dinner that night.
When we got to the end of her pretend day, she said she was hungry. I summarized that she had to eat dinner but she only had one spoon left. If she cooked, she wouldn’t have enough energy to clean the pots. If she went out for dinner, she might be too tired to drive home safely. Then I also explained, that I didn’t even bother to add into this game, that she was so nauseous, that cooking was probably out of the question anyway. So she decided to make soup, it was easy. I then said it is only 7pm, you have the rest of the night but maybe end up with one spoon, so you can do something fun, or clean your apartment, or do chores, but you can’t do it all.
I rarely see her emotional, so when I saw her upset I knew maybe I was getting through to her. I didn’t want my friend to be upset, but at the same time I was happy to think finally maybe someone understood me a little bit. She had tears in her eyes and asked quietly “Christine, How do you do it? Do you really do this everyday?” I explained that some days were worse then others; some days I have more spoons then most. But I can never make it go away and I can’t forget about it, I always have to think about it. I handed her a spoon I had been holding in reserve. I said simply, “I have learned to live life with an extra spoon in my pocket, in reserve. You need to always be prepared.”
Its hard, the hardest thing I ever had to learn is to slow down, and not do everything. I fight this to this day. I hate feeling left out, having to choose to stay home, or to not get things done that I want to. I wanted her to feel that frustration. I wanted her to understand, that everything everyone else does comes so easy, but for me it is one hundred little jobs in one. I need to think about the weather, my temperature that day, and the whole day’s plans before I can attack any one given thing. When other people can simply do things, I have to attack it and make a plan like I am strategizing a war. It is in that lifestyle, the difference between being sick and healthy. It is the beautiful ability to not think and just do. I miss that freedom. I miss never having to count “spoons”.
After we were emotional and talked about this for a little while longer, I sensed she was sad. Maybe she finally understood. Maybe she realized that she never could truly and honestly say she understands. But at least now she might not complain so much when I can’t go out for dinner some nights, or when I never seem to make it to her house and she always has to drive to mine. I gave her a hug when we walked out of the diner. I had the one spoon in my hand and I said “Don’t worry. I see this as a blessing. I have been forced to think about everything I do. Do you know how many spoons people waste everyday? I don’t have room for wasted time, or wasted “spoons” and I chose to spend this time with you.”
Ever since this night, I have used the spoon theory to explain my life to many people. In fact, my family and friends refer to spoons all the time. It has been a code word for what I can and cannot do. Once people understand the spoon theory they seem to understand me better, but I also think they live their life a little differently too. I think it isn’t just good for understanding Lupus, but anyone dealing with any disability or illness. Hopefully, they don’t take so much for granted or their life in general. I give a piece of myself, in every sense of the word when I do anything. It has become an inside joke. I have become famous for saying to people jokingly that they should feel special when I spend time with them, because they have one of my “spoons”.
© Christine Miserandino

A BIG thank you! My friends...

From left to right is the raised flood-bank along Cedar Creek - a tranquil walk 

It has come to my attention, that I have to say a very big thank you to my friends - those folks out there in the 'interwebs', who have taken the time out of there busy lives to visit my blog - read my 'ranting' sometimes 'random' posts, but thinking about my story enough to stop and leave their comments.  It really makes a massive, positive difference to me!  


So, thank you folks;
+Priscilla Hedlin ; +Kevin Weilacher ; +thillai raj ; +The Onion ; +Optimistic Existentialist ; +Cheri Interman ; +Chronic Pain Queensland ; +Todd Tarno ; +Tú Phạm ; +Jaclyn Allmon; +Lew Gray ; +ATLAS Experiment ; +Richard Branson ; +Susan Kleinz ; +Jayne McCubbin ; +Akua Hope ; +Chronic Pain Queensland ; +Vicki Whitford ; +Kouto Yamamoto ; +Linda Egli ; +Leslie Samuel ; +Janice Nichols ; +Barbara H. ; +Barbara Alma ; +Ron Garan ; +CERN ; +Abdu'l-Hanif Al Shukri ;

I thought I might just show a glimpse of 'our' little Cedar Creek. It plays a part in my journey - in the background - trickling, flowing, bubbling along. She can be both serene and at times bad tempered. We love it...

A peaceful swimming-hole - our beautiful Cedar Creek

Sadly, due to the unforseen 'Monsoon' which visited upon us 2-weeks ago - and delivered howling winds and torrential rains - our beautiful Cedar Creek has been somewhat remodelled...

Cedar Creek, view of driveway -[gone!]- The raging torrent!

Cedar Creek Road Causeway - 16in' /400mm water over road. Eventually - the Creek swelled to approx. 40in'/1100mm over the road - and the signs went under!

However - I never lose my wonderment for 'Mother-Nature'. How she can be both tolerant and terrible - in the space of a day. But, out of all the maelstrom can come new growth, new beginnings, a fresh start. Wonderful...

The NEW Cedar Creek -  exposed, raw, ready for action - new swimming holes to explore!

A new log jam - so Cedar Creek picks another route! Rocks, rocks, everywhere!

Hello 2013! Can you believe it? A 2nd Australia Day!

Tropical Cyclone 'Oswald"

I feel like a survivor - in so many ways.  I know that sounds like a tired old statement, but so what.  It is my reality, so you can hear-(?) me say it because I love being alive right now!  Maybe it's just the flavour of my "Moccona"-coffee & "Dilmah"-tea cocktail in the bottom of my mug - you know when it gets to the bottom and the good bits rush in!  So, when I feel like I do - like I do now - mostly, I forget to share it around on here in my blog, because I have to remember to blog!  That's not easy for me, at 46 with the memory that I've got - but considering all that I have been through, I feel for the survivors of the monsoon-floods in Bundaberg, when the "Burnett-River' burst it's banks, in Queensland on Saturday 26th January, last weekend...

Queensland Rivers in flood...

So in my small way, I want to say a tribute to the ordinary people of Bundaberg for being so tolerant in the face of despair.  After having lost everything - memories, belongings, houses, even the lives of loved ones - they still show a side that makes me proud to be Aussie - true grit!  When the entire northern half of their city has been obliterated by Natures fury-(Tropical-Cyclone 'Oswald"), so absolute strangers come together to help their brothers and sisters, clean up the mess left by the maelstrom from last weekend...

North Bundaberg - (in flood)

The Premier of Queensland - Mr. Campbell Newman, has graciously issued a proclamation; "That Queenslanders can have a second chance to celebrate "Australia-Day"-(formerly held every 26th January), to be given a 2nd Australia Day, on the 3rd March 2013.  Thank you sir - for giving  this courtesy!  Let's hope we can have a good weather day to celebrate, our day!

Too easy can I forget that there is always someone out there - somewhere, doing it tougher than me!  I wish I could remember that more often, than when I get reminded of that - When a tragic event occurs - somewhere around the world, or even in my own 'backyard'.  It also means that I can be grateful for the level of health I have right now too!  And that we can be good to each other, loving to our families, respectful to our friends, and when they need a helping hand - to give them a hand before they ask for it! Just like Good-Charlotte! 

Our thoughts and prayers are with you folks...

Feel like a 2nd class citizen?

This is a real account of what my wife had to endure, when trying to do the 'right-thing'!  (Names have been altered).  A true story...(worthy of @Richard Branson?).  I recently applied for and received the 'Disability-Parking-Permit'-(Australian version).  I do not get out of the house very often due to my disability, so the rare occasion that I am is a major deal for me (and my family).

Anyway, this particular day, my wife took me to see a movie at the cinema-plex.  We were in the car-park, and we noticed a message in front of this car-parking-space - and consequently now have a 'card' from 'W*******d', permitting (me) to have free-parking.  A 'godsend' for me and others with disabilities.  We were made aware of the availability of using a powered-scooter-chair, but as I 'can walk-albeit with problems', I'm not interested in using a wheelchair at this point.

In October, my wife took me to the movies - a 'spur-of-the-moment-decision' (after I'd been for a specialist-Dr's appointment).  My first day out of the house in ages!  And, an opportunity to do something 'just-for-fun'.  As I have a 'rare'-neurological-condition, called "Transverse-Myelitis" - and compounded by a 'chronic'-back-injury - my mobility is affected and I use a 'Canadian-crutch to get around - I can 'walk', maybe 50m to 100m before I can't go any further (leg-tremors; spasms; back-pain).

My wife parks the car, as close to the entry of the cinemas/shops, as she can.  I insisted that she pops-down and gets the parking-ticket 'validated' - every little bit helps!  So, with key-tag inhand (and this way we don't have to stress about 'rushing-away', once the movie has finished), she can go do our grocery-shopping, then the pharmacy to grab my medicine etc.

We hadn't done this before (parking-ticket-validation), so she went to the 'Concierge' as directed on the ticket!

My wife was greeted by Miss 'Chandry', who promptly, and loudly asks who the 'Tag' belongs to?  My wife says; ..."my Husband".  She then again is told 'loudly' that to use the 'Tag', he (me)-'the disabled person', must come to the Concierge-counter.  SO - for (me) to receive the 'free-parking' - I would have to walk the distance from the cinema's-(half way along the length of the entire shopping-center), about 500m - to have my 'Tag'-validated!  For me (a MAJOR-problem) and then walk BACK!  Surely defeats the purpose of parking near the entrance to the movies!

It would have taken me - the best part of an hour (with regular-stops), to walk down-and-back.  Maybe, even longer depending on my pain-levels.  This is not including the exhaustion I would experience from the effort required to walk that far.   My wife explained this to her and exclaimed the ridiculousness of that for me - how I could not do that (and shouldn't have to).  What is the point of me having to put that much effort in (to go to the movies), so my wife went to take the 'Tag' and the car-keys, back from 'Chandry' who had claimed them, when she first-asked for the validation.

My wife was very upset - in shock at the way she was being spoken to (she was in tears), and then angered when in the process of collecting her keys (exclaiming), she couldn't be bothered - Chandry pulled the keys and 'Tag' back (deciding) to let her 'do-it-this-time' - and 'lecturing' my wife, about;..."how people rort the 'system'".  My wife was told - "there is another Concierge, closer to the cinemas", when she asked if there was somewhere else to do it?  My wife felt that  Chandry's whole 'attitude' was condescending!  She was rude and certainly was disrespectful.

So, with a 'free-ticket' for parking (and tears 'streaming' down her face), my wife headed back to look for the other Concierge-desk - but found the 'Customer-Care-Area', instead!  At this point, she decided to contact; "Center-Management".  The lovely young lady was patient; respectful; and understanding too (my wife didn't catch her name), but she was given some forms to fill in... etc., etc.

As the wife of a disabled person, she is appalled that I (or any other disabled person) have to go to such lengths to get our 'Tags' validated. Remembering that it wasn't long ago - we could go shopping /movies there, without having to PAY to shop etc.

It is 'hard-enough'.. Every Single Day.. Without finding another 'Obstacle In Our Way'..

I understand there are scum in the community - who make it difficult for others - but the majority of us are respectful.  Law abiding and grateful for any little bit of help we get!  My wife shops at 'W*******d' and has NEVER thought about 'rorting-the-system' - and it angers us, that others do!

We don't understand the assumption that unless the 'disabled-person' fronts up at the Concierge-Desk - then we are trying to take advantage of 'W*******d'.

I am grateful for the opportunity when my wife takes me on a rare outing - that we can park 'close' to entrances - and are not burdoned by time constraints and having to pay for the pleasure of spending money at 'W*******d'.  But, after this event - we don't believe it worth it, for the time and effort required.

We are disgusted - that we were made to feel like '2nd-Class-citizens' by using this facility.  We are sure that is not the way 'W*******d' wishes to be represented.  We're not actually making a complaint about 'Chandry' - and the customer-service 'skills' that she is lacking in; and/or the 'wrong-person-in-the-wrong-place' - thoughts we have.  Concierge - she is not!

I am distressed that a 'disabled-person' (like me), would have to walk so far - to have a 'Tag' validated.  And, that a carer; wife; husband; friend; or child; is unable to help the disabled person.  I am also worried, that if I had sent one of my children to validate the 'Tag' - how they would have been treated - trying to help their Dad!

I'm not sure what can be done to remedy this situation - for holders of 'Disabled-Parking-Permits'; for their carers and family members - but, surely it shouldn't be so hard to go and enjoy a movie, as a disabled person! 

Happy Halloween Two U ALL!

Well, it's been 30 days since I last posted on my blog! ..I feel like it has been a lot longer, actually I have some news - it seems it is "All in my head"! Yeah - I know it has been a long story so far, and I have been told by more than a few doctors that it is just in my head!!!!!!

But, today I saw a psychiatrist - for the first time, as part of my involvement in the "Professor Tess Cramond-Multidisciplinary-Pain-Clinic" - at the Royal Brisbane & Women's Hospital, at Herston, (on Brisbane's Northside). I am still mentally 'drained' from the experience - my Dr, (she) was so nice and able to ask the exactly right questions - that I found myself travelling backwards and forwards, through my life's "timeline", almost effortlessly.

I was in there with my Dr (and another student/Dr too), discussing everything - from my episode with the "influenza-shot" (and my associated auto-immune reaction), to my car-accident in July 2011 (the sacroilliac-joint nerve-compression has prevented me from working since then, ok!), to right-back - to when my Dad died (I was 14-yo), and how my mum didn't cope then - back to my birth! The whole 'poster-place-card' of my life - compressed into a discussion which lasted over 2-hrs.

When I was asked to close my eyes and try to remember my last day with Dad - that was tough! I thought I would be ok, after all, it is 32-years ago... I crumbled, I could not stop it from happening.. After a minute or two of choking on my tears - I just let it bubble-over. So, I cried for a few minutes - but I did manage to go through the moments that I shared with Dad - on his last day. ... And, by the time I had recovered from that, things really became a lot easier. Thanks God. 

By the way - Happy Halloween! --- Do you like psychiatrists?

p.s.   Our chicken 'Polly' ...R.I.P (disappeared, 6th October, 2012), she was the real 'party-animal' at our place. She leaves behind - her other girlfriend, 'Merl-the-Girl'.

My Pain...

"My pain, is a drain on my brain! ...But, I will sustain my reign over my lame frame, to seize the day! ...While, asleep I play in my dreams!"

This was my latest post on my Twitter page; @GoatDodders

I had a spurt of inspiration, after reading a monthly-newsletter I've subscribed to (from a pain-treatment-Website!)...  Any way, I felt obliged to share my thoughts, so there!  Sometimes, there's no limit to the degree of help some people will give - freely!  Especially when it comes from those who "know" what they are talking about, because they live it too - PAIN! 

I have an observation.  That, "Chronic-Pain" is the one thing that is "super-slippery" on the surface!  Because, of all the symptoms of pain - chronic-pain (CP) - is the easiest to slip out, from under the microscope.  You can not see CP!  Not in an 'x-ray', not in an 'CT-scan', or even an 'MRI'... Nowhere, is CP visible! 

 If only we could treat chronic-pain as easily as a scratch or a cut! 

A 2nd Opinion?

I went to a new Neurologist/specialist today!  It was for a 'second-opinion'!  I told him everything, from the beginning in 2007-(also see my page "The Man's Tale..." above)- except the parts I could not remember! That was where my BW-(beautiful-wife) stepped in to fill the 'gaps'.  I do have 'gaps' in my memory recall - it is like a 'fog', rolling in from the sea. Then it rolls back out again, so my BW  takes over the conversation, then I step back in again!

My Doctor today was Dr.B!  He spoke with clarity about my history, as he scrolled-through my 'medical-records' on his PC, only stopping to listen to my BW and I re-tell my 'time-line' from Day-0. He did the usual-battery of physical 'tests' on me too!; reflex's, pins, eyes-(...please follow my finger!), lifting of legs-(ha-ha), squeezing of fingers, etc.

But, there was a test performed on me today, which I had not done before!  The 'tuning-fork'!  That was a bit 'strange', I thought - Dr.B would bang the tf on his leg or the bedside - then place it firmly on my skin at various points! Then ask me - 'can you feel this'? ..what about this? ..or this? ..it got to the point where I could feel it on my head - but not really anywhere else! ...(lol)!
He said... 'now I have some ideas about what it could be - but I want to see some more tests! 

He then gave me a card with 7-blood tests on it!  And we said goodbye, but not before my BW turned around to say to Dr.B..."It's not psychological - you know!  This is not in his head!"  ..and with that, he retorted, "..oh no, no, no.  Definitely this is not!" -(in my head)- Whew!  So off I went to the 'vampires' and they took some of my finest 'red-wine'!  More news to come..!  Stay tuned readers!  Please accept my apologies, but alas, my bloody-fingers are starting to cramp-up!  I have to go, for now!  

But in the mean time, I thought I might take this opportunity to show you my new 'set-of-wheels'!  I have been looking at this little beauty for a few weeks now. It is so cheap to run! And the look on my face, when I bring it home!  ...Priceless!

Should I go for 'Left-Hand-Drive', OR 'Right-Hand-Drive'?

The Things You Do...

I woke up this morning and felt some sharp, piercing, arching-pain - not in the 'usual-places'. More or less in 'the-middle'-right-side. It woke me - not unusual in that so much as I wake-on a pain impulse most always, anyhow. I had an appointment with my GP-(M.D), later on, so I'd ask about it then...
...It's all about the things you do - in the moment, when you least expect it, something comes from out of the blue - to wake you up! It happened for me when I was going over to fill-up my water-bottle from the tank. One small bump, and... just like that it was all over... snap; crackle; pop! After I got back up, I checked that I was (ok), I carried on - and picked myself up, dusted myself off and carried on!
Had I known then - what I know now, I would have made other decisions. Safer decisions - but the decisions we make are based on what we know now - 'in-the-moment'; and not-with the benefit of hindsight! And besides - I'm glad I carried on to finish what I started, because the pain was worth it. I got some valuable time with people that make me smile and laugh!
and the 'pain' was a reminder for me to ask the 'doc'... in the morning... about what I did?
...(I found out what I did - 3-cracked-ribs; and a 'bruised-kidney'!)

Have you ever kept going - even though you've done something bad?

Professor Graham Martin trained as a medical doctor;

I've been looking high and low for this particular podcast, which I listened to, back in February this year and finally I've found it! This is an interview between my local ABCradio identity-[Richard Fidler], and Dr. Martin, a lovely man whom I was fortunate to meet in person at a recent 'Spinal-Injuries-Association'-Day, earlier this year in Brisbane. Please click on the link below to listen to his insightful interview by podcast;

http://mpegmedia.abc.net.au/local/brisbane/conversations/201202/r893456_8997363.mp3 

, Graham Martin had to shift from doctor to helpless patient, changing his whole thinking on medical care. A brilliant psychiatrist and researcher into the underlying causes of youth-suicide and self-harm. ...While at his desk one day in 2009, Graham experienced a stabbing pain in his stomach and creeping numbness in his leg. It was the beginning of a new phase of his medical education, this time as a patient...

I personally found Dr. Martin's story an absolute analogue to the type of experiences I was having in hospital, in 2007. A feeling of being 'held-up-to-the-light' like an experiment from the basement, with lots of poking and prodding and testing. Just not much in the way of answers!
Anyway, I hope Graham's story gives you the same dose of 'reality' that it gave me..? 

Curiosity Has Landed on MARS!

Weeee! So,it's been a month to the day since my last post.. Many reasons or excuses could be made, as to why. But they are all genuine ones, consigned to history. Just been dealing with it - getting on with life, because I have to look to the future. My future is bright - right..!

Anyway, I have to share my well-wishes with my readers and fellow bloggers out there. The news that NASA's "Curiosity-Rover" has landed safely, on Mars. This is amazing - to think that for 7-minutes-of-Terror', nobody knew-(if the Lander was "alive or dead". Those brief moments when the Rover was entering the atmosphere of Mars, from 1.the friction-of-deceleration; 2.the parachute-opening; 3.the slowing-down from 30,000kph-[17,000mph]-to 320kph-[200mph]; 4. the separation of the heat-shield; 5. the chute-separation; 6. the activation of the 'sky-crane' rocket-engines; 7. the "Touchdown" of 'Curiosity' on the surface of the Planet-MARS!!

Relive the nail-biting terror and joy as NASA's Curiosity rover successfully lands on Mars the evening of Aug. 5 PDT (morning of Aug. 6 EDT).

Ice Cube Blog! ...(all the way from Antarctica)

That's right folks! ...All the way from Antarctica. I may be a proud Aussie from Brisbane - with TM, but it thrills me to share this info about the wonderful science being done to advance our knowledge of the cosmos. I found a blog being written by folk who live and work 6-months of their year in the "coldest place on Earth" - down-under in Antarctica. Their blog is titled - "Ice Cube Blog" - check the link here; http://blog.icecube.wisc.edu/  (and they are from the University of Wisconsin/Madison). While they're freezing their butt's off - they are doing world-leading research into Neutrino's...!!!!! So, what are Neutrino's you say?


A Neutrino is a particle with almost no mass, because it's so small. Infinitesimally small - in fact! The only way they can be found is by discovering their 'trails', left behind after they've travelled through the Earth! These very clever scientists have built a 'neutrino-detector' the size of 1-Cubic-Kilometer - and all of it is inside the ice-sheet above the land-mass ofAntarctica, in the U.S.A-Antarctic-Territory!


Sometimes I get the urge to share these bits of trivia with you, and anyway it helps to take my mind off of the 'elephant-in-the-room' (TM). So enjoy, I hope you don't mind...